That is a question addressed by coaches, sports psychologists, and parenting experts across the internet. Their advice is no doubt sound and worth the read and probably lists clinical signs of pressure, such as loss of appetite, suffering grades, trouble sleeping, and sluggish game-time performance. If you are putting too much pressure on your child in youth sports, those expert insights are important to recognize, but from one parent to another, can we put aside that clinical talk for a few minutes? As a sports parent for 20 years, I\u2019ve seen other signs–they are sneaky, subtle, and often misinterpreted–that could indicate that a child is just plain tired of the pressure.<\/p>\n
He may come home, throw his bag on the floor, and start playing video games, go to his room, or jump in the shower–without a word concerning the game or practice. And when you try to talk about it at dinner, his answers are short and apathetic. He may even get irritated at your questions or change the subject because he really doesn\u2019t want to think about the game or practice. He\u2019s tired of the stress and would rather think about something else.<\/strong> That silence, that unwillingness to talk about the sport, may really be his way of screaming \u201cI\u2019m under too much pressure!\u201d<\/p>\n As soon as practice is over, he\u2019s out of there as quickly as possible. When you suggest a quick game of one-on-one basketball after dinner, he refuses. If you offer him a camp that will help him improve his skills, he may say he doesn\u2019t want to go. Yet when you ask if he really wants to play, he says yes. He does<\/em> want to play, but he wants to play to have fun.<\/strong> He doesn\u2019t want the stress or pressure that comes with it. He may be sick and tired of being pushed and prodded and prepared.<\/p>\n The flip side to a child who has no desire is a child who is obsessed with improving his skills. I\u2019m not talking about a normal, healthy desire to become a better player, I\u2019m talking about a kid who has taken it way too far and has no room for anything in his life but working on sports. He is in over-drive because he\u2019s afraid of failing, of not being good enough. He feels pressured to excel.<\/p>\n2. Your child shows no desire to improve<\/strong><\/h4>\n
3. Your child is obsessed with improving<\/strong><\/h4>\n
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