{"id":2447,"date":"2018-01-26T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-01-26T05:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/webinology.website\/nation2021\/coach-you-make-the-difference-part-2-coaching-yourself-first\/"},"modified":"2021-11-03T13:00:27","modified_gmt":"2021-11-03T17:00:27","slug":"coach-you-make-the-difference-part-2-coaching-yourself-first","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.coachup.com\/nation\/articles\/coach-you-make-the-difference-part-2-coaching-yourself-first","title":{"rendered":"Coach, You Make the Difference (Part 2): Coaching yourself first"},"content":{"rendered":"

See Part 1 of this series here.<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

Everyone loves to win. Though some can deal with losses better than others, I think it\u2019s fair to say the obvious\u2014nobody loves to lose<\/strong>. I have never seen a team of athletes, whether young or old (coaches and parents included), NOT jump for joy and celebrate with gusto from winning a game after a long stretch of losing. Winning tastes better after losing.<\/p>\n

\n

Coaches have a default system built nicely into their DNA\u2014and that is to win. <\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

No, coach, you\u2019re not a bad person for wanting to win; you\u2019re not a bad person for wanting all the right ingredients given to you to help you win; you\u2019re not a bad person to even expect the support from your club so you can lead your team to win. And you know what would make winning even better\u2014if all the players and parents who are involved in your team like you and said awesome things about you. Everyone would sleep well and there wouldn\u2019t be any issues to deal with. Yes, winning\u2026 and when everyone\u2019s<\/em> a winner\u2026 that can\u2019t help but taste good.<\/p>\n

But let\u2019s get back to the default system built into you that wants to win and to tackle a season that you already perceive will be full of downsides, frustration and losses. (If you\u2019re an awesome coach with an awesome team with an awesome plan, you maybe wasting your time reading any further).<\/p>\n

\n

There is something you probably already know and probably don\u2019t need reminding but I\u2019m going to say it anyway: don\u2019t focus on winning. <\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Winning is a result, an outcome. It\u2019s similar to the fact that when you focus on wanting to be loved and you try everything in your power for others to love you, the outcome is the person or group you want to love you, is turned off by you.<\/p>\n

In every aspect of life we all must let go of the outcomes; they are too far away and hinder us from working on the one thing we have control over\u2014ourselves.<\/p>\n

Coaching Yourself First<\/strong><\/h5>\n

Whatever group of athletes you\u2019re working with this season, you\u2019re teaching individuals techniques and skills to add to their repertoire so they\u2019ll not only be better players but they\u2019ll also contribute to the team better.  You\u2019re working on the here and now and what is in front of you. The outcome will take care of itself. And if the weekly outcome of the individual or the team is not what you hoped for, then you evaluate what has happened and keep working on the skills, techniques or even the respect for the game that you\u2019re aiming for. <\/p>\n

Coach, you make the difference.<\/em><\/p>\n

But now, here is the big thing, and I hope you are sitting down and not going to skim through this paragraph.<\/p>\n

\n

The first and foremost person you\u2019re coaching and are responsible for is YOU. <\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

I see it all the time when coaches (also parents and players) are complaining about what\u2019s wrong, blaming others for their frustrations, and making excuses for why their situation is dire.<\/p>\n

Coach, if you want to have any chance, you must STOP all these negative behaviours.<\/strong> These only reveal your own insecurities and fears about the outcomes of your team and yourself. You have lost focus on your own personal growth and what you\u2019re learning and correcting about yourself.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll say it again, the one and only thing you can control is yourself: your reactions, your mindset, your<\/em> attitude!<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re prone to complaining, excuse making or blaming others, it doesn\u2019t create a good mix if you\u2019re prone to wanting to win. Unfortunately, very few make the effort to show self-control to stop these traits.<\/p>\n

There is no fancy formula here to speaking and acting differently. Self control is the key.<\/strong> Start with stopping  to think about what you\u2019re about to say. If a complaint, excuse, or a finger-pointing blame is about to slip out of your mouth\u2014STOP! Say nothing. Only say something if it is constructive, or encouraging, or helpful.<\/p>\n

Breathe deeply and refocus on how you need to act or react to your current situation.<\/p>\n

The default for any coach who is having a tough time (real or imaginary) is to try anything and possibly sacrifice anything to muster up a win.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t, however, sacrifice the overall good you want to create by teaching higher values of the game and having higher expectations of your young athletes. Eventually, you will be known to have made a positive difference and that difference will last a lifetime for those fine human beings entrusted in your care.<\/p>\n

Coach, you make the difference!<\/em><\/p>\n

\n

CoachUp is the safest and easiest way to find a coach for personalized training. With our 100% money-back guarantee and vetted coaches, anyone can achieve their full athletic potential. Find your perfect coach<\/a> today and become the athlete you want to be!<\/em><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

See Part 1 of this series here. Everyone loves to win. Though some can deal with losses better than others, I think it\u2019s fair to say the obvious\u2014nobody loves to lose. I have never seen a team of athletes, whether young or old (coaches and parents included), NOT jump for joy and celebrate with gusto […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":68,"featured_media":2448,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[43,45],"tags":[119,120,117,171,1877,118,22,18],"class_list":["post-2447","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-coach-resources","category-parents","tag-coach-improvement","tag-coach-patterns","tag-coach-tips","tag-coaching-kids","tag-coaching-young-players","tag-good-coaching","tag-how-to-be-a-good-coach","tag-youth-sports"],"yoast_head":"\nCoach, You Make the Difference (Part 2): Coaching yourself first - CoachUp Nation<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.coachup.com\/nation\/articles\/coach-you-make-the-difference-part-2-coaching-yourself-first\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Coach, You Make the Difference (Part 2): Coaching yourself first - CoachUp Nation\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"See Part 1 of this series here. 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